Quotes from One If By Clam, Two If By Sea


Peter: Holy crap! It's a gay bar.

Peter: Lois, the Drunken Clam's been taken over by a bunch of lousy limey tea-suckin' British bastards!

Stewie: Heavens, you don't so much speak the language as you chew on it and spit it out.

Quagmire: So, you ladies ever been penetrated?

Trisha Takanawa: For many, this charred portrait of Elizabeth II gives poignant new meaning to the phrase, "Hey, check out that flaming queen."

Steve: Well, well, Officer Swanson. You and your friends are dead, you're all dead!
Peter: Oh, good, he thinks we're zombies. He'll leave us alone.

Eliza: Ew, your breath smells like kitty litter.
Stewie: I was curious!

Peter: Here's to our wives! They may not be as hot as the women you see on TV, or as entertaining, but, um... y'know, I don't know where I'm going with this, but thanks anyway.


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